In Sickness
by BabyKay47
Summary: AU CoLor Short Lorenzo leaves his fiancée on the yacht when tragedy strikes.


Disclaimer: I used part of the dialogue from the Aug 19, 2003 episode. The rest is mine.

* * *

"Sr. Alcazar," his guard began apprehensively, "It's your fiancée..."  
  
Just from the tone of his voice Lorenzo knew that something terribly wrong had happened. "What happened?"  
  
"Sir, we tried to stop her, but she stole a gun...we didn't want to get too near because we were afraid she'd hurt herself...or someone else...her nurse discovered all of her pills hidden underneath her bed...sir, she'd stopped taking her medication and she was delusional, she thought we were trying to hurt her so she jumped overboard..."  
  
_Lorenzo felt his heart drop, he could barely breathe. He knew he never should have left her. His thoughts drifted to the last time he'd seen her...  
  
"Lorenzo, you told me you'd give me anything I wanted...and this is what I want more than anything."  
  
"No, Courtney, I can't let you risk it. You know it's a danger to your health."  
  
"It's_ my _health to risk! Don't you get that? I will never ask for anything else if you just give me this one thing. Your child. I want to feel him growing inside of me...I want her to have your eyes, and my laughter. I love you so much, and I want a child as a living reminder of our love."  
  
"Courtney, I'm tired of this argument! We've been over this a million times. The doctors said that it was dangerous. There's no way to safely medicate you without risking the child, and you need your meds."  
  
"I never imagined you could be so cold. I know that I'm bipolar. I know that I need medication to live like normal people do. I KNOW THIS! You don't think I've wished a million times that I wasn't? That I could be well without having to take a million different pills every day? But I understand all the risks and a baby would be worth it."  
  
"I'm not being cold, just realistic. You're not listening to reason. And frankly I'm sick of it. I long ago came to the realization that children aren't in my future, for one, I'm a drug dealer, and then you came into my life, and you were sick and needed me, and you couldn't have children and it worked. When are you going to come to the same conclusion?"  
  
By that time Courtney was sobbing. "I can't believe I ever thought I loved you, not as cruel as you are being right now. Get out! I never want to see you again!"  
  
"Are you forgetting where you are? This is MY yacht. But I'll leave, I have business to attend to in New York, anyway."  
_  
With that he'd left. And he'd immediately regretted his words. Now it was two days later, and she was possibly dead. He never should have said those things to her. He hadn't meant them. He was just angry that he couldn't give her the one thing she wanted the most and there was nothing he could do about it.  
  
If Courtney died, he'd never be able to forgive himself. "You find her and you had better hope that she's alive!"  
  
"Yes, sir. We've got men going up and down the shoreline searching for her, and we've alerted other fisherman and hospitals and clinics to let us know if she's discovered."  
  
"I'm on my way there, let me know the moment you find her—" he was interrupted by a call on the other line. "Hello?...You found her?...Is she all right?...Where is she?...Clínica San Paulo? I'll be right there."  
  
She was alive. Thank God.  
  
She was on her side and didn't even notice when he walked in. She looked like a little girl and the sight of her made him want to weep with relief and sadness at the same time.

"Hello, sweetheart," he spoke to her tenderly, unsure of what her response would be like after her traumatic experience.

She immediately tensed up and turned to the doctor. "No, you can't leave me alone with this man."

"Courtney, it's all right, you're safe," Lorenzo tried to assure her.

"No, he's not my fiancé. This is Lorenzo Alcazar. He kidnapped me. He kidnapped me," she spoke hysterically. "He's—he is why I jumped in the water. I had to jump—"

"She's bipolar," Lorenzo interrupted.

Courtney shook her head. "No, he's lying!"

"It's all right when she's on her medication, but she stopped taking it, obviously," Lorenzo tried to explain to the doctor.

"Oh, he's lying. He was holding me hostage!"

Lorenzo was saddened by just how badly her condition had deteriorated in his absence. "It's true she jumped off the yacht, but thinking she's a hostage is part of her delusions. Courtney, you haven't been taking your medication, have you?"

"No, he's lying. He was holding me hostage."

"Why did you stop taking it?"

"I know why you went off the medication," the doctor informed them both.

"Why?" Lorenzo asked.

"Your fiancée was pregnant. She lost the baby," she regretfully told him.

Lorenzo felt as if he had been punched in the gut. "I had no idea. Will she be all right?"

Courtney began weeping in earnest again. Shaking her head and thrashing. "He's not my baby's father. You need to get him away from me. Get him away from me! Everything he says is a lie!"

Pained by her words he turned to her and tried to grab her hand, but she pulled away and began to scream.

"Get away from me! Don't touch me!"

"Doctor, please. Please help."

"No! Get away from me!"

"Can you give her something to calm her down?"

"Hold her down."

Lorenzo struggled with her, grabbing her arms and pressing her down against the bed.

"Get away from me!"

"I got her, I got her," Lorenzo informed the doctor. "Please, hurry."

"No! No!" Courtney screamed.

"Just a second."

Courtney let out one last strangled sob as the doctor administered the tranquilizer. Then she went completely silent.

"She'll be asleep in a moment."

"_Gracias_," Lorenzo responded to the doctor.

He collapsed in the stool next to the bed. "God, Courtney, why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?" But he knew why, just as surely as he knew he was the biggest ass on the planet. He thought about why suddenly having a child had become so important to her, she must have been feeling him out to see how he'd feel about the baby, and he'd disappointed her at every turn making it difficult for her to tell him.

When she was sound asleep he asked her doctor if it would be all right for him to take her home.

She woke up on the plane ride to their South American villa. "Lorenzo?" she called out. He was immediately at her side.

He was relieved when he saw some recognition in her face. "I'm here, sweetheart, and I'll never leave you again."

She buried her face in his chest. "You were right."

"I was wrong, I never should have left you."

"No, I'm too dangerous to a child. I killed our baby," she choked out.

"You were sick, I should have taken care of you."

"How can you say that? How can you stand to touch me? The murderer of your child."

"I love you, and it was just as much my fault as it was yours. I made it hard for you to tell me about the baby, and I wasn't paying attention to your behavior. I knew something was off, I should have realized you weren't taking your medication when you would go off on me for no particular reason. And I should have suspected you were pregnant."

"I should have told you the moment I suspected, but I was afraid you'd make me abort it. Instead I killed it because I'm too sick to take care of myself."  
  
"How long have you been off the medication?"

"A week. I just found out a week ago. It was an accident, you know how careful we were, but once I discovered I was pregnant I didn't want to give her up." Tears streamed down her face as she remembered her beautiful dream baby. "You know, when I was in the water I dreamed that we had a girl with dark curly hair. And then when I woke up the doctors told me she was gone, and I knew it was what I deserved for not telling you."

"Shh...it's all right, Courtney. I'm not mad at you. I'm just sad that you had to go through it alone."

In her tiniest little girl's voice she told him, "Don't leave me alone again ever."

Lorenzo sighed and stroked her hair tenderly. "I promise."


End file.
